If you're the bilge rat in charge of this year's corporate party, listen up, me hearties.

Prod your fellow landlocked lubbers onboard the James Craig for a night of yardarms and plank walking, we'll provide the rum-serving beauties and the salty eyefulls of Sydney.

We'll give you a darstardly pirate welcome aboard and pack your pockets full of treasure chest booty.

If some prissy pedant from your finance department purses his lips and protests, keelhaul him - you won't get better value!