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If you're the bilge rat in charge of this year's Christmas party, listen up, me hearties.
Prod your fellow landlocked lubbers onboard the James Craig for a night of yardarms and plank walking, we'll provide the rum-serving beauties and the salty eyefulls of Sydney.
We'll give you a darstardly pirate welcome aboard and pack your pockets full of treasure chest booty.
If some prissy pedant from your finance department purses his lips and protests, keelhaul him - you won't get better value!
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Give us ahoy about our hornpipes, shanties and other peg-tapping entertainment.
So, scurvy dogs, get t'gether a crew and call 9298 3888 smartly! Avast! Aye aye!
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